Not blogging has been hard on me. It dimmed my happiness. Blogging keeps me thinking about things, for to publish one’s thoughts one ought to think them through, at least a little. So one does not get surprised by one’s own words. I had to stop for a minute because I had too much going on and have also been sick. So I have come to miss analyzing and explaining my feelings about things.
School gets harder towards its end, and I needed the time to write my final papers and study for my final exams; the last of which I finished yesterday. Now I can bite my nails while I wait for grades. I have about two more semesters to go and I will be done with my MA program.
I am somewhat addicted to schooling. I am of the mind that there is no such thing as too much education. That, in fact, the more one learns, the more one realizes that one knows very little and for that matter becomes genuinely humble. In a strange sense, I think that makes one happier. I may explain this theory in an opinion post sometime.
So it is December––I’m a huge fan––and I found myself telling someone, the other day, that I didn’t care much for Christmas. But today at my new retail job, there had been loads of Christmas songs playing and I was so very happy to hear them, and was also very happy to sing along. When there was nobody around, I even managed a little dance. Now I remember why I love December. It is because of Christmas.
The idea of Christmas is beautiful, even if one is alone. I think it is the beautiful feeling of having survived a year, and going through the year through memory’s eyes; it is like everybody’s birthday happening on the same day (yes, a little bias here) so that no matter where one is, one is part of a grand party. It is the bow on top of the wrapped year.
The year is not over, but it has been amazing. I feel I have learned so much about myself and have grown stronger in my self-acceptance and self-appreciation. Also I have surprised myself in both my emotional and physical capabilities.
—
J. A. Odartey
